I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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