we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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