My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
