yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize