fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Randomize