would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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