I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
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