idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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