he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
