I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
