okay pat passed out under dana's car
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
