Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
