Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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