Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  Having a random hookup so left but love u

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  (415): Having a random hookup so left but love u http://tfl.nu/w2t3
  Replies (4) Good night (1197) Bad night (657)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Why are you ignoring all of my texts?

  (1-765): View more from Indiana

  The power was out.

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  (765): Why are you ignoring all of my texts? (1-765): The power was out. http://tfl.nu/9x7x
  Replies (17) Good night (1401) Bad night (4304)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.

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  (970): Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese. http://tfl.nu/mdbn
  Replies (10) Good night (7343) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"

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  (774): she's crying while babbling "all i do is win" http://tfl.nu/5fua
  Replies (10) Good night (3868) Bad night (1108)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.

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  (303): I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume. http://tfl.nu/tvs1
  Replies (7) Good night (2721) Bad night (1022)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.

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  (206): She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers. http://tfl.nu/uzdb
  Replies (3) Good night (2504) Bad night (850)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.

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  (920): I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs. http://tfl.nu/adoe
  Replies (7) Good night (2392) Bad night (783)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?

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  (903): Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ? http://tfl.nu/d8rt
  Replies (28) Good night (4572) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12

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  (310): Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12 http://tfl.nu/ovmd
  Replies (3) Good night (1559) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude

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  (315): Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time? (540): Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude http://tfl.nu/szgw
  Replies (9) Good night (1180) Bad night (2411)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.

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  (717): This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy. http://tfl.nu/qoag
  Replies (5) Good night (1447) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out

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  (303): Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out http://tfl.nu/8vt2
  Replies (2) Good night (391) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.

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  (914): Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck. http://tfl.nu/lycc
  Replies (2) Good night (796) Bad night (434)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere

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  (614): Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere http://tfl.nu/d5we
  Replies (2) Good night (926) Bad night (459)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada

  (1-604): View more from British Columbia

  PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES

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  (604): The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada (1-604): PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES http://tfl.nu/q2yd
  Replies (1) Good night (813) Bad night (292)

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