We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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