No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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