have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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