Texts From Last Night

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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I hope im prettier

  (1-828): View more from North Carolina

  yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying

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  (828): I hope im prettier (1-828): yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying http://tfl.nu/h2yr
  Replies (37) Good night (766) Bad night (3409)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.

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  (780): Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing. http://tfl.nu/pkwf
  Replies (37) Good night (971) Bad night (3261)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"

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  (503): I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina" http://tfl.nu/3nun
  Replies (40) Good night (767) Bad night (4935)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?

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  (802): and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina? http://tfl.nu/mzx1
  Replies (47) Good night (647) Bad night (6088)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..

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  (734): you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy.. http://tfl.nu/5gkh
  Replies (49) Good night (631) Bad night (5678)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.

  (786): View more from Florida

  How high are you right now..

  (305): View more from Florida

  I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.

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  (305): Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind. (786): How high are you right now.. (305): I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT. http://tfl.nu/q5i7
  Replies (29) Good night (10375) Bad night (1141)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common

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  (907): It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common http://tfl.nu/qmer
  Replies (47) Good night (1359) Bad night (4482)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me

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  (215): i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me http://tfl.nu/j6i2
  Replies (13) Good night (1366) Bad night (3842)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  ...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????

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  (312): ...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because???? http://tfl.nu/17np
  Replies (5) Good night (2809) Bad night (1047)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet

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  (908): Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet http://tfl.nu/o0c7
  Replies (11) Good night (5827) Bad night (698)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.

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  (614): Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified. http://tfl.nu/iywq
  Replies (12) Good night (1031) Bad night (1990)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees

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  (423): I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees http://tfl.nu/90bg
  Replies (8) Good night (2559) Bad night (885)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.

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  (+61): I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden. http://tfl.nu/335z
  Replies (2) Good night (1115) Bad night (499)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.

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  (502): So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina. http://tfl.nu/7j91
  Replies (10) Good night (454) Bad night (692)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"

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  (606): And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?" http://tfl.nu/s0we
  Replies (4) Good night (493) Bad night (301)

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