Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
