Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
My hand turned me down
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
