i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
