it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
