Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(718): View more from New York

My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.

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(812): View more from Indiana

her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.

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(917): View more from New York City

well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'

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(702): View more from Nevada

i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life

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25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(605): View more from South Dakota

and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.

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(678): View more from Georgia

thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?

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(707): View more from California

Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.

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(256): View more from Alabama

my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..

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(785): View more from Kansas

How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.

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