So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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