and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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