just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
ugly people sure do ruin things
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
