Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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