It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Randomize