you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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