I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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