READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
