we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
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