I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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