Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
