The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
