I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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