It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize