In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I believe in your delicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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