If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize