how can u be prego again
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
