Cold hands, warm shart.
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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