shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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