mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
There's always time for handjobs
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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