i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
