it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
