He managed to light the Jello on fire...
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
