Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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