shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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