I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
