you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
What a dumb baby whore.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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